Perfect October Girlfriend Party: Mammograms and Margaritas! #BreastCancer

Perfect October Girlfriend Party: Mammograms and Margaritas! #BreastCancer

Mammograms and margaritas girlfriend party traditionIt’s the last day of October, Breast Cancer Awareness month. We want all our girlfriends to stay healthy for a long time so we shared about the Philips MicroDose Mammography (and the giveaway that ends tomorrow!).  We have one more idea to make sure you and your girlfriends stay healthy and enjoy time together doing it!

Why not gather the *Girls* together for a ‘Mammograms and Margaritas’ party?!

I recently read about four women who have an annual event where they schedule their mammograms together then have a GNO (Girl’s Night Out) party with some Margaritas (or Mojitos or Mimosas!) to celebrate another year of health and friendship. (Now, doesn’t that sound much more fun than going alone and no margarita?!) Another option, have the girls over to your house after the mammograms for some pink cocktails! (Note: Health care pro’s don’t necessarily condone drinking alcohol – that’s just an individual girlfriend thing!)

And of course, you can do this any month, not just October. The important thing is that you and your girlfriends take care of yourselves. Added bonus: spending time with your friends reduces stress which causes the majority of health issues, so it will make you healthier just hanging out with your friends!

For more girlfriend advice on dealing with cancer, see:

 

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Lose Weight with your Girlfriends (it’s more fun!)

Lose Weight with your Girlfriends (it’s more fun!)

Adele weight friends quoteFemale Friendship makes women healthier – and sometimes it even helps when you want to lose weight!

Let’s face it. It doesn’t matter if you have 5 or 50 pounds to lose, it’s never a fun task. However, when you tackle your weight issues with your girlfriends, you have a much bigger chance at success. Whether it’s because you set common goals or work out together, it helps to have friends on your side.

Set Common Goals

Even if your girlfriends have different amounts of weight to lose, you can still set common goals. For example, it might be a goal to drink more water or cut back on bread. When you set common goals, you can help keep each other on track. You can even choose a new habit to break or start each week or month.

Work Out Together

No one likes to work out. Okay, maybe some people do, but those people are few and far between. The truth is exercise can be boring, especially when you do it alone. When you work out with your girlfriends, you can keep each other entertained by talking, gossiping, etc. You can even motivate each other to work harder. If you’re competitive, you can challenge each other. Find a time and routine that work for you and your friend – like a long walk every Saturday morning or yoga two times a week – then hold each other accountable to be there!

Motivate Each Other

Motivation from your girlfriends can be key to reaching your goals. Instead of only being accountable to yourself, you’re accountable to your friends. When you each motivate each other to keep going, even when you’ve had a stressful day and just want to curl up with a pint of ice cream, you’re less likely to give up.

Check In with Each Other

When you try to lose weight on your own, you don’t have to tell anyone about that pack of cookies you ate or the workout you skipped. When you’re losing weight with girlfriends, you need to own up for your missteps and, believe it or not, this can be enough to keep you on track. Brave enough to send her a text with the scale each week? Do it! Send texts of healthy meals or from walks/bike rides that you take.Healthy Snacks care package

Even Long Distance Friends

You can still lose weight together! Go on walks and talk on the phone. Challenge each other and check in via texts. Compete on a Fitbit challenge. Send her a care package of healthy snacks or a gluten-free healthy snacks package!

Do Weekly or Monthly Weigh-Ins

When you get together with your friends to weigh in once a week, or month, you’ll work harder to make sure those numbers go down. It’s the same thing as going to a weight loss group, only you’re in the group with your best friends.

Support Each Other

Next to last, but not least, support each other. There will be times when those numbers refuse to move – no matter how much someone tries. Having a support system that tells you it’s okay and that you’re doing the right things, helps keep you on track. Support is important in so many steps of any weight loss program. Just be there for each other.

Celebrate your successes together

Hit a goal? Proud of yourself for sticking to your diet/exercise plan while on a trip? Like the Adele quote, maybe you skip the gym and go to lunch with a friend – then you both eat healthy.  Or you make a low cal/carb mocktail to celebrate after you work out or do yoga together. Find ways and reasons to celebrate being healthy and helping each other lose weight. Plan a Girlfriend Trip together to celebrate! (Get your beach bodies to a beach, dang it!)

Weight loss is so much easier when you do it with your girlfriends. Whether it’s the simple act of not doing it alone or the massive support you get from each other, you can shed those pounds once and for all when you do it together.

HEALTHY RESOURCES WE RECOMMEND:

A Free Resource Library of Great Girlfriend Advice?!

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  • Holiday Gifts – Christmas Gifts, Mother’s Day Gifts, Valentine’s Day Gifts
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<——- What’s NEW in the Free Resource Library?

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  • 3 FREE eBooks – including Resumes & Cover Letters
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  • JUST ADDED: Tips to make Grocery Shopping Easier
  • Girlfriend Trip Beach Recommendations
  • Money-saving Tips & Sites
  • & more!! 
10 Girlfriend Traditions You Can Start Today – You’ll be Glad You Did!

10 Girlfriend Traditions You Can Start Today – You’ll be Glad You Did!

Girlfriend traditions, female friendship

Start a Girlfriend Tradition – and start the fun! Here’s how …

How often do you see your girlfriends? Not enough?! We thought so!

The best way to remedy that is to start a girlfriend tradition (or several!) of getting your favorite female friends together on a regular basis so you stay in touch, make memories and have an excuse to laugh and share with your girlfriends!

We’ve got 10 Girlfriend Traditions you can start today!

(and welcome you to share more in the comments!) What girlfriend traditions do you have?

1. Book Club – For book (and/or wine) lovers! Our book club happens to be ‘no stress’ meaning “reading the book is optional, having fun with your girlfriends is not!” Get the girls (neighbors, friends, soccer moms, women from church) together and start a book club. (Here’s a great appetizer to take to book club!)

2. Dinner Club – Admit it, we all love to eat and drink together! Girlfriends, dinner, wine and just time together are all the ingredients for a great dinner club. Plan a theme, let everyone know what to bring (or make it all yourself), just set aside a night every month (or so) to break bread with your BFFs.

3. Birthday Club – My friend Carole has an awesome ‘Diva Group‘ (lower picture above). They celebrate their birthdays together. On birthdays ending in an ‘O’, they make it a HUGE celebration. The birthday ‘girl’ receives the number of girlfriend gifts as is her birthday. Make your own birthday celebration tradition with your girlfriends. Just celebrate the day and the gift of their friendship.

4. Seasonal Shopping Fashion Friends – Which girlfriends are your source of fashion feedback and the girls with all the coolest clothes? Start a fashion friends tradition where you meet for lunch and look at fashion trend magazines. Then scout through the stores for the best deals on the latest fashions. Shopping is much more fun with friends!

5. Swap PartyLove her sense of style? Does she always recommend the best books? Have an annual or quarterly Swap party where you exchange books, fashion accessories, home decor elements – whatever works for your girlfriends. Just bring things together and trade them. It’s almost like shopping but without spending!

6. Volunteer TogetherBe a friend to your city and spend time with your girlfriends by volunteering together. Pet cats at a rescue center. Do construction on homes for Habitat Humanity. Make a family in need’s holidays happier. Whatever you decide to do to volunteer, it’s even better together!

7. Sending Thoughtful Cards – I love to get a sweet card from a girlfriend, don’t you? Why not be the one sending the cards and spreading the happiness? Make your tradition to send a card to your girlfriends on their birthdays and those in-between ‘just because days.’ You’ll make their days, guaranteed!

8. Chick Flick Club – Post the sign ‘No Boys Allowed!’ and invite the girls over for popcorn, snacks and your favorite chick flick. Or, meet the girls at a theatre and watched the latest fun film. Make it a monthly tradition or every time a good chick flick is released. Everyone can be the best supporting girlfriends! (Here’s our list of the top 100 Chick Flicks! And here’s more on having a great movie night with girlfriends!)

9. Brunch Bunch – At your favorite restaurant or trying a new place to dine every month, set a schedule of doing brunch with your fave BFFs. Get the coffee going along with the great stories and laughter! (Not up for brunch, plan a monthly lunch. Just find a good time for all the girls to get together!) (Here’s 5 Girlfriend Brunch Ideas!)

10. Girlfriend Get-aways – Maybe it’s an annual camping trip like my friend Anitra and her friends take, or a weekend away every fall to the outlet malls (like Colleen and friends do), or maybe it’s a little more luxurious or exotic. The destination is secondary. What’s important is that you get away with your girlfriends and enjoy time together. Make memories, take photos, laugh, enjoy. Life is too short not to plan a girlfriend trip!

10. Find time for a Friend – Whatever the tradition, set a schedule of finding time for your friends. Make it and them a priority. Wine time on the porch, coffee on the deck, dinner at a new restaurant or just walking together, find time for your friends. You’ll be so glad you did!

BONUS GIRLFRIEND TRADITIONS:

  • Holiday Traditions – from gift exchange to holiday concerts, girlfriends make the holidays even better!
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Here’s more Girlfriend Traditions – fun traditions for friends!

 

The Secret to Your Dreams – Diana Nyad, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. & YOU

The Secret to Your Dreams – Diana Nyad, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. & YOU

follow your dreams quoteEvery great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.
Harriet Tubman

I have a dream. Do you?

The recent 50th anniversary of Dr. Martin Luther King’s ‘I have a dream’ speech was a powerful reminder to me. It reminded me of a time in history that, to be honest, I’m embarrassed of and sad to relive.  (Did you see ‘The Butler‘ movie? DO! It’s powerful!) It made me also feel pride for my uncle marching with Dr. King (and having a pen-pal relationship with him, both of them as ministers supporting each other and the cause of equal rights and the peace movement).

Fast forward 50 years to a small woman in a big sea between Cuba and the United States. 64-year old, fearless, determined, amazing DIANA NYAD was making history as she swam between Cuba and the U.S. without a shark tank and in the jelly-fish infested waters of the Atlantic Ocean. She too had a dream. She too followed it. And, on her fifth and final attempt (again, at age 64!), Diana made history in what some are calling the most incredible swimming record ever set.

I had the honor of seeing Diana speak this summer. She talked with passion about her dream. She lived that passion on a daily basis, and it was, I have to admit it, contagious. All 4000 women left that event with their passions revived and their dreams stirred. (Congrats Diana on your #xtremedream and for showing us how you can follow your dreams no matter your age or obstacles!)

What’s your dream girlfriend?

Do you want to graduate from college or culinary school? Is your goal to run a marathon or a company? Do you dream of writing a book, staring in a movie or being someone a book or movie is written about?

Every great dream begins with a dreamer.

We all have dreams. We do. But sometimes we lose sight of them. Our passion diminishes and we get off track. As girlfriends, we look out for each others’ dreams. We help each other. We hold each other accountable in pursuing those dreams.

What’s the secret to our dreams? You’re on Girlfriendology, you may have guessed it! Enlist your girlfriends in helping you reach your dreams, in making sure you stay on the path to follow your dreams. That’s what girlfriends do. That’s how dreams happen. Thanks Diana, Dr. King and our friends for reminding us the power and to follow our passion for our dreams!

This week on Girlfriendology:

 

5 questions for a girlfriend who’s considering divorce

5 questions for a girlfriend who’s considering divorce

5 questions for a girlfriend who's considering divorceWe girlfriends look to each other for advice. When I went through my divorce, I leaned on my girlfriends for advice and support. So, when offered the following information (guest post) for women considering divorce, I thought I’d do what my friends did for me – pass it along in hope of helping women. Share with a friend who may need this info too!

The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself. Oscar Wilde

5 questions for a girlfriend who’s considering divorce

  1. Do you two still get along? – This is the most important question, which will essentially dictate the entire process. If she and her spouse are amicable and the break-up is reciprocal, then it’s possible to skip the horror stories associated with divorce. There exists an “uncontested divorce,” where the two spouses agree, amongst themselves, on the divorce agreement. This includes the division of assets and a parenting plan (if relevant). It is considered most feasible for couples that have relatively few assets and no children—often younger and shorter marriages. If there is enough emotional detachment to pull this off, then they can actually file for divorce online. If they pull it off, they will literally save thousands of dollars and immense time in court.
  1. If it is not amicable, do you have access to money right nowThis is a question that’s relevant in the short-term for severe cases. By “access to”, I mean a bank or asset account that is in her name, or a joint account in both of their names. If all of the assets are in her husband’s name, then she isn’t guaranteed access to them. If he is severely manipulative, it’s possible that he cut her off from funds. This would leave her virtually powerless to leave the home, save help from friends or family. In divorce, there is a lag time between the filing and the court ruling. While she may eventually be awarded alimony, there could be months before everything is sorted out. It’s important to have access to money during the divorce proceedings, especially if you’re dealing with a controlling or abusive spouse.
  1. If you’re not working, how will you make money in the long term? It’s estimated that about 30% of women aren’t currently part of the workforce. Anecdotally, many women take a hiatus from work to raise children or run a household. Unsurprisingly, non-working women are most likely to live in either very wealthy or impoverished areas. If the first scenario, it’s likely that your girlfriend would be awarded an alimony in the divorce. Her main concern at that point would be to allocate and budget the alimony appropriately to pay for necessities such as: rent, health insurance, and retirement savings. She would need to be sure that the settlement is comprehensive. For example, it should require her ex to maintain life insurance, so that she may continue to get paid, even if something happens to him. If there is no alimony, then, she’ll likely have to go to work to earn income. This could be extremely difficult, especially depending education level and lifestyle. Encourage her to be resourceful and to start as soon as possible. A distant friend or relative may know of an opening that isn’t yet posted anywhere. Experience and/or longevity with a company can only help her earning potential.
  1. Is it possible that he’s hiding money? – While illegal, it’s not uncommon for a spouse to hide some of their finances so that they appear less wealthy to the courts. Sometimes a spouse has been doing so the whole time—via a “rainy day” account or secret real estate investments, for example. More often, however, a spouse will start to do so once they sense the marriage going south. Jeff Landers over at Forbes explains some of the many ways to hide money:
  • Stash cash: he may buy strange yet valuable assets like a piece of art, or put actual cash in a safe-deposit box
  • Stash assets: transfer stocks or funds to a friend or family member to hold in that person’s name until the divorce is finalized
    • Equally, if he owns a business, he could pay “employees” that don’t exist and void their checks later
  • Lie about income: he may underreport earnings on any financial statements so that your combined net worth would appear to be less
  • Overpay loans: he may give too much money to the IRS or a moneylender: then, get a tax return or refund after the fact

Advise your girlfriend to take an active role in the family’s financial affairs. Encourage her to pay the bills, balance the checkbook, and be aware of investments. Tell her to be on the lookout for behavioral clues on his part: defensive behavior, bank statements not coming to the house, or a sudden lack of bonuses/decrease in salary.

  1. Is it possible that you’ll end up with debt? This is related to the former question—both of which are parts of the grand question, “are you aware of the real financial situation?”. Everyone talks about dividing assets, and yet, often overlooked is the division of negative assets—or, debts. Attorney Guy Greenstein of Louisville, CO, clarifies that, luckily, there is “separate debt”, which would be anything that a spouse incurred before the marriage, such as student loans. Anything that either spouse incurred during the marriage, such as medical bills or credit card debt, would be “communal property” to be divided as the court sees fit. In a really tragic situation, there could be a spouse who has secretly incurred debt, such as to feed an addiction, and left the other in ignorance. The good news is that there are only a handful of states that default to dividing everything 50/50 in a divorce. These are: Arizona, California, Idaho, Louisiana, Nevada, New Mexico, Texas, Washington, and Wisconsin. The other states take divorces case-by-case, and use a variety of factors to decide the division of assets. So, if your girlfriend’s husband has secretly run them into debt, in many states, the courts would assign the burden of repayment to him. 

Girlfriend advice for divorceMarlo Spieth writes and does outreach. She empathizes most with Andy Warhol’s quote,”I have social disease. I have to go out every night”. Working for Avvo, she recommends our website for any legal needs, to get a quick, personalized, and flat-rate experience.

 Please note: The views and opinions expressed herein are the author’s alone and do not represent Girlfriendology or Avvo. Also, the legal information herein is intended for general informational purposes only and is not the provision of legal services. Please acknowledge that such information consists of third party data and contributions, that there are certain inherent limitations to the accuracy or currency of such information, that legal and other information may be incomplete, may contain inaccuracies, or may be based on opinion. 

More Girlfriend Advice on Divorce:

DIVORCE RESOURCES FOR GIRLFRIENDS

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^Girlfriend Gift Finder for:

  • Birthday Gifts for Women
  • Holiday Gifts – Christmas Gifts, Mother’s Day Gifts, Valentine’s Day Gifts
  • Cheer up Gifts, Sympathy Gifts, Just Because Gifts, Congrats, Housewarming, Hostess Gifts & More!

<——- What’s NEW in the Free Resource Library?

  • 150 Friendship Quotes
  • 3 FREE eBooks – including Resumes & Cover Letters
  • 2 Inspirational Quote Coloring Book Pages
  • JUST ADDED: Tips to make Grocery Shopping Easier
  • Girlfriend Trip Beach Recommendations
  • Money-saving Tips & Sites
  • & more!!