Treat yourself with love and compassionLove and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them humanity cannot survive. – Dalai Lama

Thanks guest blogger CLAUDIA PETRILLI for these 5 Tips to Treat Yourself with Love and Compassion.

I used to be the queen of negative self-talk: I loathe my thighs, I’m too short, I don’t make enough money. I should be more successful at my age. These are just a few phrases I’d feed myself daily. In a culture of social media, thigh gap books, and millionaire entrepreneurs, it’s no wonder we criticize ourselves for not having it all.

But what does it mean to have it all? Is it having the perfect job, slim thighs, or the beautiful home? Having it all is however you define it – whatever works for you and your life. Here are my five tips to eliminate negative self-talk, avoid comparing yourself with others, and how to be happy with where you are in life.

Tip 1: Stop those negative thoughts dead in their tracks. I know—easier said than done. But I’d like you to challenge yourself next time a negative thought about yourself creeps up. Instead of focusing on your flaws, find something positive about them or come up with an action step. Some examples:

Negative thought: I‘m underutilized at my job.
Positive thought: My job is a temporary steppingstone and I learn from all of my experiences.

Negative thought: My arms are flabby.
Action step: I can introduce strength training to my workouts to tone up.

Tip 2: Treat yourself as you would your best friend. Do you criticize your friend or call her names? I’m going to assume you don’t. You love her, support her, and are there for her unconditionally. Pretend you are that friend and speak to yourself with kindness. Some examples:

At the end of a long workday, look in the mirror and say: You did a great job in that meeting today!

Did you skip a workout? Instead of punishing yourself, say: It’s OK that you skipped your workout today—just make time for one tomorrow!

Tip 3: Make time for self-care. Go to bed early, take a warm bubble bath, read a romantic novel. Take time away from work, kids, your significant other and make time for YOU. Some of my favorite self-care activities are reading outside during my lunch break, self-massage with lavender oil, and yoga.

Tip 4: Start a gratitude journal. When you realize how blessed you are, some of the things you worry about start to seem insignificant. Do you have a roof over your head? Clothes on your back? Someone who cares about you? What are you grateful for? Whether it’s something as simple as your morning cup of coffee or your evening jog, write it down daily in a journal. You’ll be surprised to see all of the ways you are blessed.

Tip 5: Nurture your body and soul. Eat real food such as whole grains, vegetables, fruits, healthy fats, lean meats, and water. Limit things that don’t love your body back like sugar, fried foods, soda, and alcohol. I’m not saying not to indulge in ice cream or a margarita on occasion, but these should be special treats. Feed your body with the nutrients it needs to perform optimally. Do things you love, surround yourself with positive people, and remember, you aren’t perfect and that’s perfectly OK.

Now stop that negative self-talk, follow these tips, and share this post with your girlfriends!

5 ways to take care of yourself, advice for GirlfriendsCLAUDIA PETRILLI, Certified Health Coach, teaches busy bees healthy cooking tips, better diet and lifestyle habits, and ways to manage stress. As a graduate of Institute for Integrative Nutrition and certified through The American Association of Drugless Practitioners (AADP), Claudia offers one-on-one coaching, workshops, cleanses, and more. Visit for more information or contact Claudia at to set up an initial consultation.

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