45 Life Lessons – things Girlfriends Share. What Life Lessons can YOU share?

45 Life Lessons – things Girlfriends Share. What Life Lessons can YOU share?

Thankfully, we learn so much from our girlfriends.

45 Life Lessons for GirlfriendsFrom how to wear make-up and do our hair when we’re young, to how to take care of our parents when they’re old, from girlfriend advice on a job or relationship, to tips on how to save money or raise children – we’ve got our own personal ‘advisory board’ with our best friends. And, we totally believe that ‘girlfriend therapy’ is right up there with ‘retail therapy!’

We’re amazing, lucky women to have each other – and to share life and life lessons with. Following are 45 ‘Life Lessons’ that my girlfriend Margye shared with me and I thought I should share with you. Kinda helps keep everything in a great perspective. (I did have to add something to #21!)  What life lessons can you add?

1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Change the way you think.

4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.

8. Release your children when they become adults, it’s their life now.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first pay check.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.

12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie (drink the good wine!). Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Just because you believe you are right, doesn’t mean you are. Keep an open mind.

23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ‘In five years, will this matter?’

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. Your job is to love your children, not choose who they should love.

35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come…

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.”

What life lessons can you add?

More Life Lessons – like: Save the earth! It’s the only planet with Chocolate! 🙂

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Girlfriend Book Club … not so fun? Tips to Improve Book Club Night

Girlfriend Book Club … not so fun? Tips to Improve Book Club Night

Is your girlfriend book club beginning to get a little stale?

Are you worried that it might not last through another bestseller? Then it’s time to take some steps towards making your women’s book club fun and something that your girlfriends look forward to each month.

Girlfriend Book Club tips

There are no faster or firmer friendships than those formed between people who love the same books.” Irving Stone

I love my book club. We have so much fun eating, drinking and talking – that we sometimes ALMOST forget to talk about the book. Even though this girlfriend get-together is a blast, there are always opportunities to make it even more fun – right?! So, here are 7 Tips to Improve Book Club Night:

1. Branch Out – People make the mistake of sticking to books that are on the bestseller list. Branch out. Read classics. Read books written by independent authors. Read the book a friend has been raving about. Don’t limit your choices. More importantly, give everyone a chance to pick a book by alternating who picks each month or have everyone write down their choice and pick next month’s book from a hat.

2. Create a Themed Menu of Snacks and Drinks – People are more apt to have fun when there are drinks and snacks involved. Things are even more fun when you create snacks and drinks that revolve around the book’s theme. For example, if you’re reading a book set in Kentucky serve a bourbon-based cocktail and bourbon pecan pie. (For the book, The Help, one of my neighbors brought chocolate pie to Book Club! What a scream! For more ideas, read ‘Angry Housewives Eating Bon Bons‘ by Lorna Landvik – very fun read about girlfriends in a book club.)

3. Watch the Movie – Another great tip is to choose book club books that have a movie and then watch the movie during the meeting or, if it is a current movie, go to the theatre together. You can then compare the two by discussing the actor choices, how close the movie stuck to the story line, etc.

4. Have Giveaways – Everyone loves giveaways and you don’t have to give away expensive stuff. It can be some cheap paperbacks you picked up at the local dollar store, bookmarks, $5 Amazon gift cards, etc. You could then give away items during the discussion or you could even have a contest on who brought the best snack to the meeting.

5. Swap Books – Chances are all the book club members read a lot of books each month. Why not do a book swap during the book club meeting each month? This is a great way for everyone to get more books to read without spending any money. (Note: my book club also does a magazine swap every Summer. We all get to try new magazines and take a summer vacation from reading a required book.)

6. Choose Fun Discussion Topics – Last, but not least, choose fun discussion topics. Talk about the sexy hero. Discuss who would make a great cast for a movie version. Talk about any loose ends and how you think the author should tie them up in the next book, etc. Just have fun with it and don’t stick to the discussion guide you found in the book or online. It should be fun, not an assignment.

7. Bring a New Friend Night – Our Fave, of course, is to make it a very social evening and invite other women to join you. They can choose to read the book or not, and may get out of bringing an appetizer or dessert (or whatever guidelines you have for eating at book club!). It’s just fun to meet new friends and to have new conversations with new women.

Your girlfriend book club doesn’t have to be boring. There are so many easy tricks you can use to make the meetings more fun. Whether it’s talking about the intriguing characters in the books or turning each meeting into a book swap, you can definitely improve your women’s book club.

More Book Club inspiration:

 

A True Friend is Worth … | Girlfriends vs. Feeling ‘Unfriendable’

A True Friend is Worth … | Girlfriends vs. Feeling ‘Unfriendable’

There’s some talk lately on women feeling ‘unfriendable.’

one loyal friend quoteSeems a lot of women don’t feel like they have many friends, or have no new friends from the last decade or so. Busy schedules, jobs and families, too much to do and too little time … all contribute to a friend-less or friend-poor life. Lack of trust or self-confidence, insecurities and scars of failed friendship, cause us to shy away from new friends. We have our ‘Facebook Friends’ but they’re not there IRL (in real life) sometimes. We have social connections, but will they pick up our prescription when we’re sick or offer a shoulder when life brings tears? Will these online friends know that we’re going through hard times just by our tweets or that we’re struggling with finances or relationships just by a “frowny face”? 🙁

One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives. – Euripides

Research shows that female friendship makes us healthier, happier, less stressed, live longer and feel more beautiful. REALLY! It’s the opposite of being ‘unfriendable,’ it’s the choice of being there for your friends, of being open to friends, to actively being ‘friendly,’ to recognizing the amazing blessing of friends in our lives.

Friendship – It is a CHOICE. I know it’s tough. I know your schedule is a mess and a stress. I know you have way too much stuff on your plate and way too little time to be the parent, partner, employee, etc. that you’d really like to be.

Girlfriends – It’s a CHOICE. It’s taking, making time to phone a friend. It’s putting time with your girlfriends on your calendar – be it a girlfriend book club or starting a girlfriend tradition, giving more thoughtful girlfriend gifts (that show that you care, that you would take time and be thoughtful for them). It’s deciding that you want to be a better friend.

Just think about this … relationships sometimes come and go more than we desire or plan. Jobs do the same. Kids grow up. Families always change. Soccer season ends. People move away. Differences happen.

If you’re lucky … if you’re really, REALLY lucky … you’ll have FRIENDS by your side through all the other changes in life.

Want a FRIEND? Be a Friend! Choose not to be ‘unfriendable.’ Make the effort. Spend the time. Show an interest. Find a new friend. I know … You’ll be so glad you did.

Still feel ‘unfriendable?’ I hope not. But we’d love for you to share your thoughts in the comments below. We want to be your friend!

This week on Girlfriendology:

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5 Mistakes to Avoid to have Great Friendships

5 Mistakes to Avoid to have Great Friendships

silence of our friendsI want to be the friend who’s there for my girlfriends, don’t you? If so, you probably don’t want to be silent when they need someone to speak up, or not there when we should be the friend who is there for them.

In the end, we will remember, not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.” Martin Luther-King

I want to be the friend (and you must too if you’re here on Girlfriendology) who doesn’t make these friendship mistakes (but I have, so I’m trying to improve and be a better friend):

1. Not giving her the benefit of the doubt – Let’s start with the BIG friendship mistake. Did she say something bitchy or behind your back? Was she not there when you needed her to be? Did you hear something she said/did that hurt your feelings? STOP RIGHT THERE. She’s been your friend for a long time and through a lot of stuff, right?! Maybe she had a bad day, was misquoted or misunderstood the situation. If she’s been there for you for years, and through ‘stuff,’ give her the benefit of the doubt. Trust that she is there for you. Don’t come to conclusions looking at the negative. Girlfriends are there for each other. Be there for her – no matter what your first impression is.

2. Taking sides. Let’s be serious about friendships. If they’re good girlfriends, they’re worth getting away from the silliness of taking sides. Just be there for each other. Don’t team up with each other. Conspire on the behalf of your true friends. Stay on her side when she needs you.

3. Too busy to spend time together. Time. The most valuable gift we can give our girlfriends. “The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time,” said James Taylor. Pass time together – spend time together – be there for your friends. Make take for your girlfriends. Don’t make this mistake!

4. Choosing to be with ‘the guy.’ Sure, being in a romantic relationship can lead to some ‘friendship challenges.’ We want to be there for them and there for our friends. A true friend values the friend who doesn’t change, no matter whom she dates. A real partner will understand and value that you have your own life and your own friends.

5. Playing games. Let’s be the realistic girlfriend. Women can be catty, mean, unfair, unkind. Girlfriends can do all the above – choose who they’re dating over their friends, be ‘too busy,’ take sides or not give her the benefit of the doubt. We can play bogus games or take each other for granted. Let’s stop the games. Let’s be there for each other.

Do you make these friendship mistakes? Do you wish you had better friendships? Well, it’s not that hard – just be a better friend and avoid these friendship mistakes. Life’s too short to not be a better friend. We girlfriends need to be here for each other. We need to be the friends we’d love to have. We need to NOT make these friendship mistakes.

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Here’re some ways to be a better friend:

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Top Five Travel Accessories Every Girlfriend Needs

Top Five Travel Accessories Every Girlfriend Needs

5 travel accessories every girlfriend needsI travel a lot; I hate having my life disrupted by routine.  ~Caskie Stinnett

Planning a girlfriend trip anytime soon? Do you make a list of things to take, or do you just throw everything in a suitcase and know that somehow or other it will all work out?

Travel writer and guest blogger NOELLA SCHINK shares some of her favorite things for women travelers to take on a trip.

There is a list a mile long of the places my best friend and I have left to go in this world, but we’ve been lucky enough to get out and travel a bit so far. As a practical lady who grew up in Maine, you’ll find my tips are always budget conscious (though my girlfriend always lets me know when an item is worth a splurge!) and frill-free, yet still stylish enough to take across the globe.

Smartwool Slippers

Merino woolI like these cozy slippers for travel because they are light, they never get smelly, and the Merino wool feels so lovely and luxurious on my tootsies. This rare wool also wicks away moisture so your toes will never get clammy. Not only are they an in-cabin flight staple, but they are also indispensable for hotel bathrooms and scuffing down the hallway to the vending machine for a bag of Fritos at 1am. Not that we would ever do that. The Fritter Free Heel is a clog style with an indoor-only felt sole, or you could opt for the Morning Ballet which doubles as an achingly cute flat that can be worn from airport to hotel check-in. My friend was so green with envy when she saw me slip a pair of these on in flight she immediately ordered her own pair!pashmina scarf, purple blanket

Pashmina

This is one accessory where the adage “you get what you pay for” truly applies. You can find a knock off, poly-blend wannabe for under twenty bucks at the mall kiosk, but once you feel the luxury and warmth of a real Pashmina shawl, you’ll never go back. I recommend a Pashmina/silk blend for maximum softness and sheen. If you treat yourself to one of these in a versatile color, it can triple as a scarf, plane blankie, and demure shawl when you are out for a nice night on the town or perhaps whilst on a breezy beach treating yourself to the sunset. The real ones will be made with wool from Nepal or Turkey.

Mini Farouk Chi

As I said before, I’m usually quite low maintenance (as well as low tech), but this travel-sized flat iron has come in handy so many times that I can’t leave it off the list. You know your hotel will have a hair dryer, but it will be so cheap/inadequate that you’ll need a styling tool to help you out. I know that one of the biggest treats about travel for me is the chance to hair straightener travel size“go out” in an exotic city. And though I might be wearing week old jeans and my swimsuit for a bra, I still want to look nice. I travel with my best girl friend, and we are far past the point of impressing each other with shaved legs and high heels, so we get glam in other ways. This versatile, packable tool heats to 392 degrees in about a minute and has top-notch ceramic plates that will smooth even my frizzy waves in a single pass. Even though the handle is wee, the plates are full size, so you are getting the complete Chi styling experience at about half the price and weight!

L.L Bean Medium Personal Organizer

It couldn’t get more “Mainer from Maine” than L.L Bean, but you’ll have to admit we are ontotoiletries,organizersomething up here when you check out this toiletries bag. I have looked high and low for a more sensible, sturdy bag, but nothing compares. This pouch has multiple compartments so your mini bottles don’t get jostled around, a hook, removable mirror, and even side pockets for easy access to your regulation quart baggie of liquids as you ease through airport security. As if it could get any more practical, it’s even made of material that’s easily wiped clean if your toothpaste should unfortunately explode mid-trip (definitely has happened to my friend!).

Lucky Brand Abbey Road Crossbodycross body bag

A definite indulgence, this bag is worth it because it’s made of baby-soft leather, it looks ever-so-chic, and will last for years. The utilitarian side of me loves it because it’s so well made, roomy, and (there’s that word again) practical. The fashionista inside me covets it for the classic look, and the leather that is seriously so soft. Every woman needs a crossbody bag for travel because it’s a hands free style, it’s more secure to your body (and therefore a pickpocket deterrent), and it will fit an in-flight magazine, spontaneously purchased souvenirs, a camera, and every other necessity women need to have with them at all times, even halfway around the world (do you really need to lug your spare glasses, hand lotion, phone charger, hair brush, and five lipsticks around Prague? No. Will you anyway? Yes). You obviously need this bag. If you are the luckiest girl in the world like me, your best friend will get it for you for your birthday, otherwise, get it for yourself—you’re worth it!

travel writer accessories

NOELLA SCHINK is a travel writer from Portland, Maine. She loves to see new places and loves Excellent Hotels for her hotels in New York, Paris, London, and beyond!

What we share on Girlfriendology is what we would Genuinely share with a girlfriendWhat are your travel necessities? What “go-to” items do always take when you leave home for a while?

Now that you’re ready to travel, why not plan a girlfriend trip? Get inspired by this girlfriend trip to the royal wedding, or don’t have time for a trip – go explore your city with a girlfriend!

 

 

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How to Help a Girlfriend go After Her Dreams

How to Help a Girlfriend go After Her Dreams

How to Help a Girlfriend go After Her DreamsHow to Help a Girlfriend go After Her Dreams

It echoes in your head, “Reach for that stars, and follow your dreams!” Wouldn’t it be wonderful to have someone standing in the wings of your life’s stage cheering you on and turning that elusive “wind beneath your wings” song into a reality? If your own desires in life aren’t taking off, live vicariously through the dreams of your friend. If you’ve already arrived to see all of your big ambitions fulfilled, hitch a cloud and help a girlfriend go after her dreams.

You see it in her. There is a true passion that begs to burst out, but something is not allowing her to go after her big dreams. Maybe her passion is to launch her own business, she knows how to tell a great story and wants to publish her own book, or maybe she has incredible photography skills. Whatever her goals are, they will be easier met with the help of a good friend. Grab a hold of these helpful secrets that successful women already know to help her attain her dreams.

Be strong, be fearless, be beautiful. And believe that anything is possible when you have the right people there to support you. Misty Copeland

Get a pretty journal, and start jotting down ideas. Write down your desires and then create an outline or flow chart to be your road map to success.

Take practical steps to get it done. If her dream is to dance and sing on Broadway, but she’s never been on stage or taken a dance class, it’s time to start from the beginning. Get experience and build a resume’ to fulfill her dreams. Identify the tools around you that you already have at your fingertips and put them to good use.

Do what you love. The first step is realizing what her dream is. If she already knows, you are on the path to fulfilling her dreams. If she doesn’t have a dream, now is the time to help her set goals to end in success. You are her friend who knows her best. Be a mirror for her to reflect back the talents you see in her. Acknowledge the truth of her ambitions and bring them to fruition.

Find the courage to take a risk. Like the cowardly lion in the Wizard of Oz, she probably already has all of the courage she needs to go for her dreams, but she may not have the confidence to realize the courage she possesses. It’s your job as her friend to bring this out in her. Encourage her. Literally, instill courage in her by pushing her beyond any fear or doubt.

Don’t let fear and doubt take hold. The next biggest obstacle to overcome is to strike down fear and doubt before they take hold and shatter all potential dreams.

There will always be skeptics, but that doesn’t mean they have to direct your path. Silence the skeptics. Never take what a naysayer says to heart.

Step out and do it. Literally take the first step toward her dreams. This doesn’t mean abandoning her to set her free. Sometimes, she may need you to take the first step with her. If this involves raising funds, set up a crowdfunding campaign for your friend. She may just need a cheerleader to encourage and support her – be THAT friend!

Help her pursue her dreams and have no regrets.

Don’t worry about the future. Live in the moment, not looking back and not worrying about what the future holds. Instead, focus on what you need to reach your goals.

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^Girlfriend Gift Finder for:

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  • Cheer up Gifts, Sympathy Gifts, Just Because Gifts, Congrats, Housewarming, Hostess Gifts & More!

<------- What's NEW in the Free Resource Library?

  • 150 Friendship Quotes
  • 3 FREE eBooks - including Resumes & Cover Letters
  • 2 Inspirational Quote Coloring Book Pages
  • JUST ADDED: Tips to make Grocery Shopping Easier
  • Girlfriend Trip Beach Recommendations
  • Money-saving Tips & Sites
  • & more!!